An ode to Marie Kondo

Ending clutter, which by definition is anything that I consider to be extraneous to an ordered household and mind, is always on my list, but because of a rather gummy combination of procrastination and the desire to do more interesting things, its place on the list is last. Today I found a related inventory among my Facebook notifications designed to help me eliminate some of those objects that are filling up both my home and my mind with … well, junk.
First on the list is “The other side of a pair of lost earrings”. Now there is something significant. I have lost a lot of earrings, mostly only one of each pair and have now a collection of scatter pins. They don’t take up much room, but they are there in the container with the existing complete pairs. So, when I have time, I’ll sort through the jumble and get rid of them. When I have time.
Then comes, “scraps of wrapping paper”. How did they know I have these things? Do other people save ends and pieces of wrapping paper for those small but significant gifts that we never give?
Socks with holes and old T-shirts are on the list. Yes, we have these and somehow, they never leave the house. We stash them in bags and hide them in boxes with the idea that they make good dusters. I calculate that, at this moment, we could dust New York State and have a few still unused.
Expired coupons and greeting cards that have no sentimental value are on the list. There is a drawer in the kitchen that is stuffed with the former and several shoe boxes with the latter. Those boxes include greeting cards sent by companies and their representatives full of the institutional sentiment of more sales … but it has gotten to the point of late that I get more of these than I do those that have any true sentimental value. But then I’m thinking that sentiment is sentiment, whether generated by affection or avarice. You get what you can get. So, do I hang on to them?
Then there is the item, “scratched nonstick cookware”. If I got rid of all of my scratched nonstick frying pans, I would have only one I avoid like the plague. I bought this pan at the restaurant supply store in a moment of weakness thinking that it would give me special chef-like cooking abilities. I never considered that chefs have other people to wash their pots and this beauty takes forever to clean. Should I get rid of it or the scratched stuff? Along with the disreputable fry pans, the list includes pens that don’t work. I do believe that besides the two that reside in my purse, all of the others in our house fit into that category. At least it seems that way when I am looking for one to take a phone message. Who wants pens that don’t work?
Logically, tops on the list should be “clothes that don’t fit”. There is a closet full of really nice clothes from five or six years ago that belong to a slimmer me. Realistically, they should go, but hope and a seemingly eternal membership in Weight Watchers have convinced me that even at this advanced accumulation of birthdays, it is possible to lose enough weight to get into the stylish but too-small apparel. These are my aspirational lode stones. My talismans of weight loss.
I do have a rather large box of cables and wires from old electronic gear. I have no idea what they are for and no one else in this house does either. But they may be useful. They are a just-in-case save.
But not the coffee mugs. There’s a bit of a problem here. The spouse brings these things home on an erratic schedule. Some people rescue dogs, my husband rescues unused coffee mugs. There is no more room in the closets for them…they must go, but don’t tell him. I must admit that at some junctures of decluttering I have resorted to using other people’s trash for disposal (with their permission, of course.)
And then there is the continuing conundrum of how and where to dispose of my extras. I do know that various animal shelters can use extra towels, that some “thrift shops” will take electronics, that yard sales require a great deal of prep work. And then there are those things that no one wants. Take shoes. I tried to dispose of three pairs of shoes. One pair was worn once for two hours, and the other two pairs were never worn. No one wanted them. Taste may have had something to do with this, but getting rid of perfectly good washed bed pillows that have flattened into less than optimum fluffiness is impossible. There are three of these compacted beauties on the back seat of my car, looking for somewhere to go. I’ve been turned away by two thrift stores and a Rescue Mission drop station.
I have so many books to read, my spouse’s birthday card to make, seed and plant catalogs to read and friends to visit, but I guess I could wrap the singlet earrings in the small pieces of paper and give them as gifts.. That would be a start.