Never be a sore loser
Lately I’ve sought solace and meaning by shopping on QVC and, even more insidiously, watching the cooking channel.
Everything looks so enticing; only a phone call or the kitchen away.
I am going to the store today to buy yeast.
I am going to make bread — evil, high point bread.
Sigh…
Darn you CNN, MSNBC, the evening news on any channel — even BBC America!
This election cycle has been horrifying and my coping mechanisms even more so.
It reveals a lot about what has meaning in my life. Right now it is paraphernalia that I really can live without and over-the-top high calorie foodstuffs. I am ashamed.
It is part of being human to look for meaning.
Sometimes we aren’t aware of that pursuit.
Life is so encompassing that we are more apt to run through the day checking of all of the “to do” lists and responsibilities that we aren’t cognizant of the direction, the meaning that underlies those daily pursuits.
Chatting with an acquaintance the other day we reminisced about the time when our sons were in middle school and it became clear that neither of us had any clear memories of that time other than some kind of vague idea that it happened.
We both were working full time and had added all of the other things in our lives to our days without a thought to what it all meant.
But it did having meaning. We put our families first and by doing that, we placed ourselves in positions that implemented the values attached to “family first” and all of the stress that accompanies the balance between paid employment and home.
We negotiated the balancing act as best we could, keeping our eyes on the prize of “family first.”
We believed in the processes of home, work, our faith, our country, our community and our families’ lives.
We were able to handle all that came to us because we were sure of the infrastructure of our lives, those processes working, sometimes unconsciously, that were the underpinnings of life.
Today another friend and I talked about meaning during our later years, the search for who we are and what we mean in today’s world. Family is still first, but how we implement that and other priorities has changed.
In the current world, age does not have value.
Who we were, what we learned, how we lived, the world as we see it, its morality and ethics are, in many cases, discounted.
Along with losing physical abilities, we have lost that gravitas that we had as younger adults. How often do we hear or surmise the phrase, “It’s a different time now?”
Some of us have morphed ourselves into other beings, pursing lives we might have lived by finding other jobs, working diligently on hobbies, going back to school or volunteering.
Some take pride in being a dinosaur.
Others have simply accepted that, as in the old Ed Ames Song, “My Cup Runneth Over,” they “don’t even notice the world growing cold.”
Cold or not, meaning is still important, to feel that who you are and what you believe has value.
The processes still function. How we continue to adjust is different.
While I watch more QVC and Food TV, I do watch and am aware of the coming election and although I am dismayed by a lot of what I hear, it won’t deter me from exercising my love of my country, the meaning that I put into the democratic process which is fundamental to implementing my values.
There is meaning in my vote and your vote. The process is essential to our democracy.
Essential.
I urge everyone, everyone to vote. Your vote counts.
Without this process, our democracy becomes something else. We are not some third world country where elections are discounted and those who lose, take up arms.
Our Constitution has given us the methods by which we can put our agenda, our values, our meanings into the arena.
We have the methods to redress our grievances.
As Abraham Lincoln said …, Actually I can’t remember the exact quote but basically it said, “when we have ballots, we don’t need bullets.”
That is patriotism.
And then there is my dad who told us never to be a sore loser. That too.
